In my book, Child Abuse: Prevention Through Understanding, I pose a critical question: would any parent willingly walk into their child’s room and throw a bag filled with the most extreme pornography and violent videos onto their bed and leave them to it? The answer, of course, is a resounding “no”. Yet, when parents provide unmonitored internet access via smartphones or computers, they’re doing exactly that. This has been happening ever since the smartphone debuted in 2007 and internet access became widely available in homes starting in 1995.
The claim that parents were unaware of the risks is simply untrue. Over the years, most adults have explored the darker corners of the internet out of curiosity, and children are no different. The real issue is that many parents have allowed this exposure, convincing themselves their children won’t wander into inappropriate or harmful content. The reality is that they do. Children are now fully immersed in the digital world, with their lives increasingly dictated by social media, most often without any parental oversight.
For some parents, granting their young children (sometimes as young as two years old) access to the Internet is a convenient form of electronic babysitting, keeping them entertained for hours. However, this convenience comes at a significant cost. Activities essential for a child’s development—like sports, outdoor play, and socializing with peers—are being replaced by solitary online time, thereby isolating children from interacting with the real world.
The consequences are clear. Numerous studies are showing alarming increases in mental health issues, suicide rates, loss of social skills, as well as growing addictions to smartphones and social media. In the last decade, social media use among young people has skyrocketed due to the rise of smartphones. Around 24% of teens report being “constantly online,” and nearly half say they feel “addicted” to their phones. Today, 81% of American teens are active on social media, which has been linked to higher rates of depression and suicidal tendencies. Concurrently, suicide rates among youth have surged, with suicide now being the second leading cause of death for this age group. This disturbing trend directly parallels the rise of social media use (1).
Social media has been shown to negatively impact well-being, fueling anxiety, depression, loneliness, and a fear of missing out (FOMO). Research links excessive time spent on social networking sites to psychiatric disorders, including depression, anxiety, and low self-esteem. The constant use of smartphones, computers, and tablets also disrupts children’s sleep as they stay up late scrolling through apps. Sleep is critical for learning, memory retention, emotional regulation, and overall health. When teens don’t get enough rest, it can lead to attention problems, low academic performance, mood disorders, and eating disorders (2).
It’s easy to point fingers at technology companies; yes, they exploit children’s lack of maturity. However, the ultimate responsibility lies with parents. They are the gatekeepers of their children’s access to technology. Many parents justify giving smartphones to their children due to peer pressure or the need for communication. But these needs can be met with a basic flip phone, without internet access. Peer pressure is not an excuse to endanger a child’s mental health.
It’s no coincidence that tech industry leaders like Bill and Melinda Gates didn’t allow their children to have smartphones until they turned 14. Steve Jobs similarly restricted his children’s access to technology. Titanic Actress Kate Winslet has also spoken about refusing to let her children use social media due to its harmful effects on self-esteem and mental health.
My position hasn’t changed since I wrote about the bag of harmful content ten years ago. There’s no justification for giving children unmonitored access to the vast and often harmful content available on the internet. It’s time for parents to take responsibility and recognise their direct role in the long-term damage that unrestricted technology use can cause their children.
Ref:
1. Memon, A. M., Sharma, S. G., Mohite, S. S., & Jain, S. (2018). The role of online social networking on deliberate self-harm and suicidality in adolescents: A systematized review of literature. Indian journal of psychiatry, 60(4), 384–392. https://doi.org/10.4103/
2. van den Eijnden, R. J. J. M., Geurts, S. M., Ter Bogt, T. F. M., van der Rijst, V. G., & Koning, I. M. (2021). Social Media Use and Adolescents’ Sleep: A Longitudinal Study on the Protective Role of Parental Rules Regarding Internet Use before Sleep. International journal of environmental research and public health, 18(3), 1346. https://doi.org/10.3390/
Evin M. Daly, M.A., PGC Behavioral Psyc, CFI
Analyst/Researcher of Violent, Abusive, and Coercive Behaviors | CEO, One Child International Inc. | Child Protection Advocate