Listen; I like the environment and animals as much as the next guy. But there are few things I can imagine that would be less entertaining than reading an official report on biodiversity.
In fact, some obscure academic giving a 20 minute speech on how we need to protect the lesser-spotted newt sounds like a great way to clear a room if the fire alarm stops working. It would be less painful to have my head dribbled on concrete like a basketball.
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